this week's sign that the appocolpse is upon us

I was flipping channels tonight (hey I earned it with my two-day mock bar exam) and saw this listing:

USA Rock Paper Scissors League Championship®
Rated: TVPG
Running Time: 60 Minutes
Genre: Other

On ESPN 2?!

Which means, apparently, that it is as much of a sport as bowling, billiards, competitive eating, spelling bees, world's strongest man competitions, and poker.

ESPN programming and acquisitions director Ilan Ben-Hanan said the channel felt the competish would be a "fun" alternative for its viewers. The sports cabler is no stranger to nontraditional sporting events, having televised the National Spelling Bee and several major eating competitions (including the annual Nathan's hot dog battle).

"Nearly everyone has played Rock Paper Scissors, so it will be interesting to see the strategic skills displayed by this elite field of competitors," Ben-Hanan said.

Oh Variety, I love how you read like LA executives talk.

And why do Americans love this idiotic game? Why it is because the French saved our butts in the Revolutionary War, especially Commander Rochambau, for whom it is named. And here I thought it was Ro Sham Bo some sort of abbreviation for Rock Paper Scissors. At least, that's what I learned on ESPN 2. I needed that space for Bar exam trivia, not cocktail hour trivia. Damn you, ESPN 2.